You know my heart.
You have come to me at night;
you have examined me completely
and found no evil desire in me.
Blessed is he who has never sinned! Who has never lied or cheated, who has never thought or said bad words or who was never envious, proud or mistrustful and has never wanted something bad for someone; who has never taken a wrong thing in itself and always treated others honestly and sincerely. Blessed is he! – But for us normal people that is often different unfortunately.
We often think very well of ourselves, and the few small sins actually can be ignored.. We really often have the feeling that we are actually pretty decent and good! Until God’s examination comes. Then we feel bad, until we are completely down. Any irregularity He brings into light. He reveals our secret thoughts. He shows us our pride, hardness, coldness, stubbornness, selfishness, hatred, revenge and greed until we are quite small before Him. Terrible are those nights when God tests us! Many tears are shed then.
But this test of God is necessary. We should see ourselves properly and become completely dependent on His grace. This grace He wants to give us because of His mercy. It should wash away our guilt and keep us from going further on the path of self-righteousness. How good it is when Jesus says to us after a long battle: My child, although your guilt is so powerful, my love and forgiveness is even greater! Then we can recover in Jesus’ hand and if a trial comes, or the enemy wants to rub all debt in our face again, he only finds a clean, righteous man. Yes, in Jesus my heart finds peace! With Him I am safe when the examination arrives and the enemy wants to push me down. He will find no injustice on me, because Jesus has paid for me. This is the grace that God has prepared for us and why we need to go through the dark nights of testing.
Thank you, Jesus, You are my Savior and Redeemer! With You I am safe when the enemy attacks me. You’ve paid for me and hold me in Your strong, loving hand – You have forgiven all my fault that speaks against me. How fortunate that I have found grace and forgiveness in You! Now my heart can be calm, relaxed and happy.
You know my heart.